Do you find yourself procrastinating before you place words on a page or brush paint on a canvas? Do you think twice about putting yourself on the line, to be exposed to others, and the possibility someone might call you a dreamer, or useless, or a no-hoper. Do you wonder if you are ready to put your words out there for all to see? Do you wonder if you have got anything worthwhile to say?
Is this fear reasonable? Is this fear really the fear of being vulnerable?
Watch this inspiring video below by Brené Brown. She is a research professor at the University of Houston and has spent the past ten years studying vulnerability, courage, and authenticity. In the video below, Brené explores the power of vulnerability and the concept of wholeheartedness.
Brown on the video discusses how the feeling of not being worthy enough can limit your ability to connect with other, to create and to fully be who you should be…warts and all.
She suggests you need courage to be imperfect. I love that line: ‘you need courage to be imperfect’. Maybe I should add it to one of my many mantras. How many times have I stopped myself from doing something, because I’m not perfect. But who is? To have courage says Brown is to tell the story of who you are.
I guess I never really feel worthy, often hiding behind different shades of hats. A chameleon. Always striving to please and live up to others’ expectations of you they think I am or should be. There are times when of course I’ve been my ‘authentic’ self, but there are not many people who know the real me. It makes me wonder how many people ever know someone truly.
But the tides are changing. If you want to make positive changes in your life, if you want success – you cannot hide in the shadows pretending you’re not ‘that’ person, but be who you are. As Brown said: ‘the more authentic you are, the more you are able to connect with others’.
Vulnerability terrifies me – to put myself on the line and to stand up and say ‘yes this is who I am’. It’s no fun being judged and here is a question: are you really being ‘judged’ and if so, who is judging you? Is it the stranger down the street, your best friend or is it YOU?
Stand up, be proud and give your best. We need to let ourselves be seen.
For me, my creative side is who I hide from others. Sharing my talents or the lack of talents to others is what makes me feel vulnerable. To shout to the world: ‘Hey this is what I created. These are my thoughts. My feelings.’ And maybe others will scorn. But this is my problem and hurdle to overcome – a fear of rejection.
So fellow readers/writers stand proud and unleash that fierce person hiding in the shadows. Be brave. Take a risk. Be fearless. Kia Kaha (be strong, get stuck in, keep going).
What terrifies you right now? What courageous act are you going to commit in the next five minutes? I dare you to take that chance and just do it….